district 9

go see this movie. that's the bottom line.
there's so little i can actually say about this film without ruining your movie-going experience. don't let anyone go into any real detail about what this movie is about before you see it. i went in with a very basic idea of what this film was about and was still truly surprised and impressed.
peter jackson and his marketting group did a great job in portraying the film to be something much different than it truly is.
great storyline, amazing special effects, original concept, and an appropriate mix of humour and action.

just go see it for yourself.

inglourious basterds

it's hard to find anything negative to say about quentin tarantino's newest film, "inglourious basterds". starring brad pitt (lt. aldo raine), mélanie laurent (shoshanna dreyfus) and christoph waltz (ss col. hans landa) the movie is an entertainingly humorous revenge story full of much-deserved blood and violence. brad pitt pulls off yet another outrageous character as the knowville, tennessee-born lieutenant of eight jewish-american soldiers who drop into nazi-occupied france before the normandy invasion. their goal is to inflict as much damage to the nazi forces as possible through apache guerrilla-style warfare; and yes, that includes scalping one's victims. the mission is about more than simply thinning the german herd, though; they enlist excessively violent and horrific means of killing and mutilating their victims. their reputation spreads throughout the nazi ranks as one survivor of each attack is spared to retell the atrocities he witnessed at the hands of the 'basterds'. they become the bogeymen of the third reich.
that's only one of many storylines that cross and converge at different times throughout the film.

tonight, being the saturday or the film's opening weekend, all viewers at the discover mills theatre were given survey sheets to fill out after the show. i gave high marks in every department although i was a little disappointed that the survey gave no section for viewer comments. the acting was superb, the script full of action and complex dialogue (written as only tarantino can), and the score was more than fitting. i especially loved the ramped-up version of beethoven's "fur elise" in the opening scene.
i was hoping for a bit more screen time from b.j. novak (pfc. smithson utivic - he also writes the scrpit for and acts on 'the office') but when he is on screen he is exactly what the story needs him to be.
and you gotta love that ending. classic tarantino. his best work since "pulp fiction".
i cannot say anything more without giving away too much.

trueblood

what the fuck is this horse-shit? ( should horse-shit be hyphenated?)
i mean, i understand the whole anne rice, laurell k. hamilton and that twilight chick craze going on right now but seriously, it has now been taken too far.
based on the popular vampire/romance novel series following one sookie stackhouse (a telepath who dates a vampire.) set in present-day new orleans - which, by the way, is full of vampires - vampires have "come out of the coffin" as one article put it and live (kind of) amoung the living. the show takes its name from a bottled beverage company which distributes actual human blood in a variety of blood types. i've only seen most of two episodes but this series has to be targetting the female high school demographic. frankly, i'm quite disappointed in the showtime network for stooping to this level to attain new viewers. (but hey, everyone's got to make a buck, eh?) showtime has some great hit shows out there; personally, i watch 'weeds', 'dexter', 'the l word' and would like to try out ' californication'. but this is more it's more soap opera than supernatural action. the plot is loaded with topless girls enjoying orgies and drunken dance parties but only as a backdrop to the actual storyline. it's as if the writers knew how deplorable the show would turn out so they loaded the scenery with an excess of supporting actress tits. it's like their way of telling their viewers boyfriends "we know this story sucks and the acting is horrible but at least we threw in some nudity for you."
as far as the actual plot line goes, i have no idea what's going on because the two episodes i've seen we're not order. their is however, a dedicated group of ultra-devout christian zealots determined to kill all vampires. this part is reminiscent of 'dark angel' and the super-secret pure-blood cult that tried to kill genetically-enhanced persons.

i think i may use the hyphen superfluously. i hope it's not too annoying to read.

"the libertine" and "accepted"

"the libertine" -- a vile, unsavory account of john wilmot, the 2nd earl of rochester, in 17th century england. a crude cynic with a vulgar tongue and sharp wit, depp portrays wilmot without apology or a desire for the audience to find him likeable. be prepared to hate the main character not due to poor writing or acting but because that is how the viewer is supposed to feel. he is meant to be despised. both admired and abhorred by those closest to him in life, wilmot lives his life in perpetual pursuit of visceral gratification; his life and death are on his own terms. depp once more takes on the biopic of a legend, and plays his part expertly. it takes a daring actor to portray a man accurately regardless of the critical fallout of the role.
other biopics in depp's repertoire include "fear and loathing in las vegas," " finding neverland," "donnie brasco," "ed wood," "blow," and "lost in la mancha".

"accepted" -- justin long, lewis black and a formidable cast of lesser-known actors comprise the cast of this coming-of-age comedy. following up his supporting roles in various comedy films long became a household face with last year's "waiting" and his current mac computer commercials. he is fast on his way to becoming an icon for those who refuse to play by the rule and accept life as it comes to them. after being denied admission to eight separate colleges, bartleby gaines (long) and he decides to create a fake acceptance letter to south harmon institute of technology (s.h.i.t.). he then has his best friend design a web site for the fake institute to decieve his skeptical father. hoping only to decieve his "college-is-the-only-way" parents long enough to get his life straightened out he is faced with a serious problem when his dad chooses to drop him off at school and speak with the dean in person. using the tuition check his father wrote, he renovates a decripit asylum into the facade of a real college and hires a friend's uncle to act as the school's dean. but that's only the beginning of his troubles; through an oversight in the website design, a couple hundred other college hopefuls are accepted and show up for orientation unexpectedly.
the story isn't as shallow as it first appears as it turns into a force of resistance against mainstream thought and re-evaluates what higher education is all about. and though the plot is completely improbable in real life, it makes a statement to which many young (and possibly older) viewers can relate. it goes from a slacker's rouse to a rebel's statement about choosing one's own path in life and not exchanging one's dreams in order to fit into the mindset of modern expectations. it's not about whether a man takes the road beaten path or the one less traveled, it's about him having the freedom and courage to choose which one he takes.
the title itself has a layered meaning. first, it's the sory of a college that not only accepts any applicant but also his view on life. and second, it's an open rebuke to what many parents feel is an acceptable path for their children to take.

masøn's "worst films ever" list

feel free to add on your most-hated flicks:

1) ultraviolet - there's no reason this should ever have even left the script's rough draft stage. why, milla jovavich, ehy?
2) deception - saw it when i was a kid. it was my "worst movie ever" for years
3) miami vice - i mean, seriously, did they pay so much money to get colin farrell and jaimie fox that they didn't have enough left to pay a scriptwriter?
4) bloodrayne - total b-flick. michael madsen, michelle rodriguez, kristanna lokken -- what were you three thinking? you're so much better than this.
5) superman returns - i thought it was supposed to based on a comic book, not a romance novel.
6) any batman movie except the first one and the last one - christian bale and michael keaton kick ass and the scripts were well-written; all of the others are a scar on the reputation of the only good superhero dc comics ever had.
7) cool world - brad pitt and gabriel byrne should've known better. hell, even kim basinger should've known better.

descent

for the most part, i loved this movie.
the less you know about it going in the better. so if you've yet to see it, stop reading now.
the story starts out as a group of six women engaging on a spelunking trip on the first anniversary of the death of one woman tragic loss of her husband and only daughter - on that daughter's birthday, no less. the team's leader opts to take them into uncharted caverns rather than the ones they had planned on but chooses not to let anyone know until it's too late to turn back due the collapse of a tunnel through which they had just crawled. then they realise that other spelunkers had been here before when they find equipment that hasn't been in use in about a century.
then the twists begin. the leader is accused of changing cavern in out of insatiable pride and reckless abandon. there are even hints that she had been involved in an affair with her friend's husband at the time of his death. then someone runs off and breaks her leg. but being trapped beneath the earth with no way of escape, an injured member and internal bickering just isn't enough. that's when the creatures appear and start attacking the women and eating them alive. literally.
the action gets an adrenaline kick at this point -- as does the frantic emotional state of the group. desperation, cold-hearted abandonment of friends and self-preservation take over. they get separated. some get injured, some injure each other, some get eaten, one finds out about the affair.
then they all get mad. they begin fighting back. they fight with knives. they fight with bones and antlers. they fight with those nifty rock-climbing axes that they all brought with them. they even take on these beasts with their bare hands. and sometimes they win. the blood, gore and betrayal mount as the remaining women descend (get the double entendre of the title?) into an animilistic state of survival.
in the end, the main character reaches a moral impasse just shy of the newfound escape passage as she stares down her dead husband's mistress and has to decide whether or not to forgive her trespasses. by this point, however, she's spent hours killing these subterranean, evolutionary ancestors of the human race and is quite comfortable with the concept of murder. what will she do?

superman

odd isn't it that brian singer and james marsden jumped the marvel/x-men ship to go off and do the new superman movie?
anyway, the graphics are much better this time around - superman actually seems to be flying, not just hanging from ropes. they insert a little bit of realism to the plot that most superhero films leave out, as well. what happens when a hero can't leave saving the world to be with the woman he loves? lois lane marries someone else. what happens when a hero doesn't get the concept of miranda rights and forgets to appear in a court of law as a witness against the accused? lex luther gets off scott-free. what happens when the hero has a sexual relationship and forgets to use a condom? superman fathers a childout of wedlock. what happens when doctors need to administer life-saving medical attention to a man with impervious skin and a high tolerance toward electrical shock? well, they can't.
but the film also fails in a few ways. how can a shard of kryptonite tear through superman's blue tights and into his kidneys, yet a rapid-fire, high-powered gattling gun doesn't even cause a loose thread? how can superman's son have life-threatening allergies, asthma and a botched immune system? and if he doesn't have any of the super stuff how does he shove a piano across the room? besides that, how come he shows neither emotion at having pulverised a man with a grand piano nor astonishment at his ability to do so?
and most of all, why does superman's comeback movie seem so much like a bleeding romance novel than a comic book?

pirates or the caribbean - dead man's chest

let me start by saying that this film surpassed all previous opening weekend sales records ($132 million) and the largest single-day take ($55 million). after one weekend, it was only $1 million behind "mission: impossible 3"'s total box office sales.
let me continue by saying IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE YET, QUIT READING THIS REVIEW!! -- i'm about to give away some elements from the film that might ruin it for you.
i'll start with the premise. captain jack sparrow (johnny depp) thirteen years prior made a deal with captain davy jones (bill nighy) to raise the black pearl from the depths of the sea and that he may captain the ship for thirteen years. jack's end of the deal was to serve 100 years on davy jones ship, the flying dutchman -- a sentence set to begin at the end of his thirteen year reign as captain. as shown in "the curse of the black pearl", jack is mutinied by his crew after only two years and has reclaimed the black pearl about one year before "dead man's chest" picks up. and i might add that his crew appears ready to mutiny once again as he is seeking a legendary chest and its key in order to bargain with davy jones for his life rather than going after treasure and pillaging.
the film opens with elizabeth swan (kiera knightley) kneeling in her wedding dress amid tables set for a reception in the rain, looking quite miserable. it appears as if something infinitely more horrible than wedding day rain is bothering her. yet it never explains what that might be nor why william turner (orlando bloom), her fiancé, is inside his smithee shop rather than somewhere more appropriate, just before his wedding. that opening is one of the few qualms i have about the film. there just isn't much too be said against "deam man's chest".
johnny depp returns in full drunken swagger as the sexy captain jack and his character hasn't changed much from the first film except that this time his selfish intentions are laid bare from the film's start. in the first film, he is trying to regain his ship; this time, he is trying to save his soul from 100 years of service to the flying dutchman. and he convinces others -- namely, will and elizabeth -- to achieve this goal without telling them of his true plans. he runs much more in this film, however; on land, on the pearl, with the pearl, in a long boat. the entire film is jack running scared from one painful death or another. maybe commadore norrington was right in calling him "the worst pirate [he'd] ever heard of". in two films, he's yet to do any true pirating. sure he commandeersa few ships in the first film but here he's more of a pickpocketing negotiator than a cut-throat pirate. he gets into sword fights only when his powers of persuasion have failed. he's a great charcter but i thnk the character himself needs to come to terms with not being very pirate-like. i think jack is in denial about who he truly is. his rare moments of pride and virtue are overcast by his overwhelming need for adventure and freedom but you see that he really does have a conscience in this film. when rowing away alone in the only longboat to save himslef from the krakken he turns back to the ship not to fight but to get the remainder of this crew. and when elizabeth shackles him to the mast to allow them to escape, he doesn't argue or fight -- he knows that this is the fate he deserves. he merely gazes at her with a look of bemused respect and admiration both for her deceptive cunning and for her cold-hearted realism that this is the only way for anyone to survive. he smiles appreciatively and calls her a "pirate" with pride.
his greatest moments are what he assumes will be his last. he breaks free, regains his hat and for the first time stares death in its ugly face and stands his ground unafraid. he draws his sword and advances on the fiercest sea creature of all time with a smirk on his face.
kiera knightley is stunning as the new and improved elizabeth. still beautiful, smart and bold, but no longer the damsel in distress. she has learned swordplay from her fiancé and can hold her own. she actually goes out with jack to rescue will. her deviously sexy flirting with jack to try and get her way turns out to be double-edged, though, as she begins to have feeling - no i should say yearnings - for him, as well. the film falters slightly there. there's no foreplay to this romance; she's been in love with will for so long and is ready to marry him and all that and then suddenly jack's there and she's daydreaming about him. the prob;em, as i see it, is the lack of building in the first film. "dead man's chest" gives plenty of little tidbits to show the possibility but they weren't present in "black pearl" so it still seems too sudden.
orlando bloom is more lively and loose this time as the love-struck swordsman will turner. he's more the pirate now than before, giving orders in jack's absence and having the entire crew following them. his fearlessness in the face of danger contrasts sharply with jack's run-and-hide technique. he stares unflinchingly into the face of davy jones, he bargains with his eternal soul just to learn where the all-important key is hidden, he takes five lashes with calm reserve, he even risks his life setting up an offensive against the krakken while captain jack has already abandoned his own ship.
and a word or two about return faces. commadore norrington ( jack davenport) comes back as a broken down, unemployed drunkard who joins jack's crew. most of the ending crew on the peral return along with captian barbossa's monkey, which jack shoots incessantly in anger as it somehow still maintains the curse of non-death. the two comedic relief pirates show up with the dog that keeps the prison keys. and in the most unforeseen turn of events, geoffrey rush, himself, returns as the notorious captain barbossa who somehow is still alive. personnally, i don't know how they justify resurrecting the character, but it will surely make for a great third film as barbossa actually leads the remaining crew to rescue jack and the pearl. the third film is slated for next memorial day.
and for that one i'd like to make one prediction: the female witchdoctor/seer whose name i've forgotten is davy jones' true love. note the heart-shaped locket captain jack almost lifts from her table. davy jones has an identical one atop his organ which plays a little melody to help him fall asleep.